Strengthening the Marriage

The Bible opens and closes with marriage. Paul says that marriage in the human family reflects the divine mystery of Christ and His Church. Therefore marriage is the most sacred covenant that men and women can enter into. The following information is provided as a study guide with regard to marriage.

1. Adam was created to serve the Lord, and to enjoy Him. He was created in the very image and likeness of God. Since we know that Christ is the Word of God, and that He Himself is "the Image of the invisible God", it is safe to assume that Adam somehow reflected Christ in the divine mystery of Christ and the Church. It can also be said that the husband (man) represents the Word of God, since he is the seed bearer. Cf. Eph5:22-23.
2. God fashioned Eve out of Adam. She was uniquely created. Paul teaches that the wife is a reflection of the Church. Eve being taken from Adam, pictures the Church having its origin in Christ. Cf. Eph5:31. The deep sleep that God brought upon Adam can be likened to the cross. When Adam awoke, God presented to him his wife. Thus the mystery of the Church.
3. Adam and Eve were to be co-regents. Adam had the primal authority. Eve’s role corresponded to his. Cf. Genesis 1:26-28; 2:7,15; 1Tim2:13; Eph5:22-24. In the marriage the husband has priority of leadership. This does not diminish the wife’s role. She is a fellow heir of the grace of life. This is why the Bible warns against mistreatment of the wife. Cf. Gal3:26-29; 1Pet3:1,2,7.
4. God gave Eve (the wife) a role not always understood by men. She was to be a ‘protectress’ or ‘surrounder.’ The word "helper" in Genesis 2:20, is ezer. It means to help or succor. The root word is found in all the Semitic languages. In Ugartic it means to rescue and save. Ezer carries the idea of military assistance. God gave the wife a role to fulfill. This is why Paul speaks of the wife’s role as that of keeping house. Cf. 1Tim5:14. (King James has "guide the house." The Greek is ‘oikodespotea,’ which means to manage family affairs.)
5. Maleness and femaleness are giftings of God. Cf. Genesis 2:18-25. In verse18, the Lord says it is not good for man to be alone. Maleness and femaleness are gifts, and that together the husband and wife participate with God in the creation of new life. The ancient sages had this saying: "Anyone who does not fulfill his obligation to have children, he has diminished the divine image."
6. In the eastern Hebrew culture, the Lord God is the great Shadchan (Marriage Maker). In giving Eve to Adam, the Lord was saying, "Adam, I am giving you a gift. You must nourish her, care for her & cherish her. You must never mistreat her, or make her feel unimportant or inferior. She is not a toy for your amusement. She is fearfully and wonderfully made. Study her and learn her heart. She will bring great blessings into your life." Cf. Psalm 45:10-15. Compare this to Genesis 2:21-25. Also note Prov18:22; 19:14; 1Co7:12.
7. Adam drew Eve back into his heart. The man’s role is to speak words over his wife to draw her to himself. In his heart is her rightful place. He sanctifies her to himself. This is where Biblical love is created. Biblical love is a commitment. It doesn’t always come before marriage. It is created in the marriage, by words and attitudes. Our western culture has suffered over a misplaced idea of marital love.
8. God has the final word. In Genesis 2:24, the Lord was saying that a new covenant is in place. The new union must now take center stage in family relationships. This is not an issue of breaking down family closeness. The first commandment with a promise is to honor your father and mother.
9. Marriage is called kiddushin in Hebrew. It speaks of hiddenness, withdrawal, covering, modesty. The same Hebrew word is used both for marriage and for holiness. In the marriage God intends there to be separateness. The husband and wife are to merge into one soul, or life. This relates to the veiled bride. She is sanctified to one man. Marriage was designed to be a lifetime commitment where God fills in the blanks. The result is a marriage blessed. Cf. Prov31:27-31.
10. Partners in a shared venture. Notice how the Old Testament closes in regard to marriage. Cf. Malachi 2:13-14. Companion is the word ‘chabereth’, which means a fellow participant, partner, or associate. Mature love allows for the merging of lives not submerging. The idea is a blending of personalities that is a combination of both.
11. The joy of marital love. Cf. Eccl9:9. In the Bible, the act of love is a celebration of life. For the Hebrew people the act of love is considered part of the Sabbath. It is called ‘the Sabbath delight.’ Cf. Prov5:15-20.
12. The law that governs the marriage is the ‘law of lovingkindness.’ Biblical love is a mitzvah. A mitzvah is a commandment that requires action. To withhold love in your marriage is a sin. This includes emotional and physical love. Cf. Psalm 128; 1Co7:1-5.